Marriages That Go The Distance

Wouldn’t it be great if you were surrounded by good marriages? People who offered some hope that marriage is more than status quo? People who didn’t settle for less than great? Well you’ve found the place. MarriageChampions.com is a place for people to find hope and inspiration to make the challenges of marriage more fun and to help you go the distance.

Are You Marriage Champion Material?

What’s your relationship IQ?
A good marriage shouldn't require a lot of work, it should happen naturally.



I should always be true to my "feelings" and act accordingly.



A good marriage is not 50/50.



Unresolved conflicts are best left alone. Eventually they will work out.



Infidelity is not a possibility in my marriage. We would never do that to each other.





Help For Your Marriage

Scratching the Marital Itch

When it comes to experiencing love in your marriage it’s crucial that you discover how your spouse feels loved. After you’ve taken our intimacy interview you and taken some time to dive into conversation with your spouse- you’ll have insight into what makes your spouse “feel loved”.  For some husbands a home cooked meal and a clean and organized home may make him feel secure and loved.  Others may not mind the dust or chaos or dining on a frozen pot pie, but feel extremely loved when their wife encourages him with her words.

See, my husband LOVES having his back scratched. I’ve learned over the years that if I want to have a healthy marriage, I’ll be a great back scratcher.  What if my I were scratching my husband’s back and he was trying to direct me to “the spot” yet, I kept missing it. When I was through, it may have been a nice gesture, but he would have been left unsatisfied and possibly even frustrated. Love and marriage works the same. You may feel that you are “loving” your spouse- but are you scratching their “itch”. Is what your doing communicating love to him or her?  If not, you’ll both be left frustrated. Take time to understand your husband or wife and communicate love in the way that they hear it best. Your efforts won’t go unnoticed.

Diffusing Anger Diffusing Anger

Too often we associate emotions with being negative or “bad” when in fact emotions, such as anger, fear, disappointment- are a natural by-product of functioning in this world.  We often punish people in our lives for “feeling” these negative emotions. Doing this is the equivalent of punishing someone for their toe hurting, or a headache. Feelings are a part of life. If we train ourselves to see these emotions like “indicator lights” on the dashboards of our life- we can use “feelings” as a productive part of life.

Anger is often an indicator light that flashes when we’ve experienced injustice.  “That’s not right.” “That’s not fair”- These thoughts are often followed by feelings anger and frustration. Additionally anger and fear go hand in hand. Wherever anger is present, so is fear. Fear of abandonment, fear of the unknown- these feelings are often the root of anger in your spouse.  Healthy marriages are those that find the best way to deal with these emotions. Two ways we can use emotions to improve our relationships.

1. Take ownership of our emotions and use them in constructive ways.  Take responsibility for our behaviors.

2. Seek to understand our spouse. What is the “root” emotion. Nothing diffuses anger like being “understood”

Don’t let emotions destroy your healthy marriage, use them to build a strong marriage that stands strong against divorce.

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